


Sometimes You Find The Oddest People At The Mall Pet Shop… Like The Guy With The Reptiles And Amphibians… He’s A Friggin' Weirdo

by DeathsLastPrayer



Series: A Series of Unrelated Events Starring Jean x Eren [12]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: (Bonus) Cheesy flirting, But -love at the pet shop, Fluff, M/M, Total dorks here!, like... a crazy amount of them being kinda cute
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-24
Updated: 2015-08-24
Packaged: 2018-04-17 00:36:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4645821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeathsLastPrayer/pseuds/DeathsLastPrayer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In Which: Jean works at The Pet Shop for the summer and Eren is the oddball who keeps coming in and buying up all of the mice and Insects. But, for some reason, Jean digs him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sometimes You Find The Oddest People At The Mall Pet Shop… Like The Guy With The Reptiles And Amphibians… He’s A Friggin' Weirdo

**Author's Note:**

  * For [cowdo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/cowdo/gifts).



> This one is for the lovely and wonderful [Cowdo](http://archiveofourown.org/users/cowdo/pseuds/cowdo) who wanted a pet shop AU (extra points if they're dorks)! I hope I pulled this off for you! Sorry it's a day late -I was no where near net until this morning when I got back home!

* * *

##### 

I. 

* * *

Jean’s new to The Pet Shop (it’s legit called that and it’s so straightforward, he laughs every time). 

It’s not his idea job but his uncle knows the owner and gets him hired for his first summer back from college so he can’t complain. Pays 13.50 an hour –for some reason. Definitely can’t bemoan that. He wants to think that it’s because his uncle knows the guy but, no. Mikasa’s the manager and she gets paid handsomely (double his pay if he heard right). Sasha and Connie get paid a dollar more than he does so… it’s not a fluke. He doesn’t understand how a mall pet shop can pay its employees so well but it doesn’t particularly matter. 

He’s got money for the summer. 

And the job isn’t tough. 

The Pet Shop is surprisingly large and has all sorts of animals –exotic and domestic. Even special orders for animals that they don’t house come in and the boss always gets what the customer wants. Always. Maybe that’s why they’re paid so well. 

Whatever. 

The job is easy. Consists of: feeding, grooming, and cleaning up behind the animals and working the register. Bonus points if they sell merch but that’s not a requirement. There’s also the live food and bait that needs to be handled with care (and it freaked Jean right the fuck out at first) but that’s not too bad. 

Easy. 

Downside: the customers. There are so many creeps that need to be chased away from the store. The types who come in and ask questions about eating the animals or keeping dozens or wanting exotics that are outright illegal but they insist on asking. Fucking creeps. In addition, he gets groups of annoying, shitty little brats that come in to (1) stare and coo over the puppies and kittens or (2) scream and make faces at the reptiles, insects, and rodents. Annoying. And then there’re the preteens who try to flirt, which is nasty business. Nasty. 

But there’s one person that he can’t quite categorize. 

A gorgeous guy that’s his type to a “T”. Dark hair, surreal eyes, gorgeous smile, personality as wide as the sea… He comes in all the time and talks a mile a minute about mundane things –real cute type. But. But, he buys weird shit. An abundance of bugs and a shit ton of mice. Jean pegs him a fucking weirdo. Learned his name –it’s Eren. Mikasa’s older brother is what Sasha tells him one shift. During another, he catches them together –Mikasa and Eren- and he can kind of see the resemblance but, Eren is full of life and Mikasa is his opposite. Quiet, reserved, says no more than she ever needs to. But Eren talks enough for the both of them so really. 

Gorgeous and a complete mystery. 

A gorgeous, mysterious, fucking weirdo who buys insects and mice in bulk from a mall pet store. 

And Jean wants to know everything about him. Is captivated and so curious that it burns away at his mind and festers on his tongue. 

So it takes about three weeks (during a closing shift) to muster the courage just to outright ask. To start digging and making some sort of connection before the summer leaves him wondering and missing out. “What’s with all of the insects and mice? Are you a humanitarian or some shit?” 

Eren grins wickedly, “Or some shit.” 

“Oh, ha ha ha.” 

“Well, you didn’t specify what that ‘some shit’ could be.” 

Jean leans against the counter, pointedly rakes his eyes over the box of mice and the bags of insects, “I’m curious, tell me.” 

Eren shrugs. He thought someone would have told Jean about him already. Apparently not. That’s a good thing though –it gives them something to talk about. “You’ve heard of dog and cat sanctuaries, yeah?” 

Jean nods. 

“Well, few people like the more _creepy crawly slimy_ type of rescue animals so I started this sanctuary a few years back for reptiles and amphibians.” It’s not a conventional hobby or occupation but- “I love ‘em, ya know. I mean, people tend to think that snakes or lizards or frogs or newts and such are disgusting but they’re really beautiful. From the way they move to their colors and their sharp eyes and- I dunno how to explain it but they’re really amazing.” Not that Eren usually cares to but Jean seems genuinely interested. 

And Jean is. “I sort of agree with most people but, I dunno, you make me want to see what you see.” Ah, yeah… Eren looks surprised by that. Looks beautiful with his wide eyes and half-smile and he’s fucking passionate as all hell about his animals. Still a weirdo but he’s cute. So cute. “I- um… Maybe you can show me. Your sanctuary.” That- That sounds like the worst fucking come on. It makes Jean’s ears turn the same shade of ruby as Eren’s cheeks. 

But Eren’s entire body takes on a crimson hue and his lips quirk at the corners before he’s flashing a grin that makes Jean melt like butter on the inside- “Yeah. Alright. Um… Let’s trade numbers, yeah. You can text me on your next day off or if you have an early day or anytime really… if you want?” 

“For sure.” Jean is stoked when they exchange numbers and Eren leaves with this shy and curt goodbye –it’s not his usual boisterous ‘see ya around’ so Jean counts himself lucky. 

They’re making the type of progress that he’s secretly been hoping for. 

* * *

* * *

* * *

The first text that Jean sends Eren is: _I’m so fucking bored. What are you doing?_ It’s the very next day and Jean doesn’t abide by the dick rules of having someone’s number (waiting for “x” amount of time until it’s cool to text or call or whatever). Not only that, Sundays are always slow and he hasn’t had a customer in the last hour. He really is bored. And he really wants to know what Eren’s doing. 

Eren’s text takes a few minutes but it eventually comes. _takin a break 4rm lurin this anaconda out of a neighborhood pond_ _J_

Jean stares at that text for a long time because- what the fuck? He’s watched those campy horror movies about anacondas and he’s seen a documentary or two so he knows what the hell that snake is capable of. Knows where it should be and where it shouldn’t and California is a long way away from the Brazilian Rainforest. A long way. So, how someone managed to smuggle that shit into the states or how Eren ended up going after it (with all of the hows/whys/wheres circulating)- 

**Jean:** _Dude… I have so much respect for you and your weird ass job right now._

**Eren** _: Lmao I bet. She’s gorgeous as anything n she’s comin back to the sanctuary 2nite if I can get her so wish me luck_

**Jean** _: Good luck._

The thought of Eren wrestling a giant ass snake that can eat him for breakfast in an instant makes Jean laugh a bit because he’s still sort of stuck on “what the fuck” and the image that pops into his mind is amusing as all hell. But, seriously. Eren is a weirdo. No, he’s really fucking weird in the oddest way that makes him so fucking cute because- because who really goes out of their way for that kind of danger? Who? No sane person just wakes up and decides “I want to be a reptile wrangler”. Apparently, Eren did and has and is. 

Granted, it’s also kind of sexy in a “snake charmer” sense. It’s the sort of thing that makes Eren exotic and unique and different. 

And Jean’s always been into those sorts so… 

So he’s definitely looking forward to where this thing might go. 

Definitely. 

* * *

##### 

II. 

* * *

Jean’s next day off is a Wednesday and he lets Eren know as soon as he finds out. They make arrangements to meet at the mall for lunch and then to the sanctuary thereafter and text a shit ton in between because Jean can’t get enough of Eren’s day to day. Like, the guy kind of lives in the moment with his whole “pet rescue” gig and he’s always out there rescuing reptiles or amphibians or whatever the hell else he can get his hands on because he seems to have a thing for the underdogs of the pet world. 

Whatever the case, they text and talk and then the day finally comes and- lunch. 

Lunch goes well. 

Jean finds out that Eren’s sanctuary is his life’s work –something that he lives and breathes with every fiber of his being (which he gets from prior conversations but it really hits home when they talk about it in person). But that’s just one piece of a much larger whole. 

See, Eren travels a lot to rescue, not just reptiles and amphibians, but all sorts of pets from all over the country. According to him, it started as a "thing" to help his dad out –just a side business. And then it blossomed because, like Eren said when they first spoke, few people dig the creepy/crawly/slimy sorts or they just give up taking care of them after a while. Anyway, young Eren gets hooked. Falls head over heels for his dad’s side-job but it probably helps that Eren views the man as some sort of superhero, which he is (in a modern sense of the term). 

So Eren’s sanctuary means a lot to him and Jean feels a strange sense of honor because he’s being allowed to see it. 

Truth be told, he’s also a little bit terrified because- reptiles! The thought of snakes and lizards and- yup. Scares the shit out of him. Just a bit. He might work at a pet shop but that’s a fear that his mom instilled in him when he was a brat. It’s her fault. 

All of which he tells Eren during the drive over. 

Eren laughs, “That’s how everyone feels at first but reptiles and amphibians and arachnids are just the same as any other animal: they have their good points and bad points. Like, you have poodles and shit that are so fucking cute and docile and yippy and then you have those fucking pits or rotts and they’re cute as all hell too but they’re vicious little shits in the right circumstances. Some people are scared of those big dogs with the vicious connotations attached to their breed but the little ones can bite too. It all just depends how you raise and treat ‘em.” 

Jean nods and cracks a smile. When Eren puts it that way, it makes a lot of sense. A lot of different animals can be frightening given the right circumstances. 

“All of that said, same goes for my kids. I have my non-lethal cuties like my newts or emerald tree boas or even my iguanas –they won’t hurt you. And then there are my babies that are a bit more lethal until they get to know you. Those are the crocks and gators… certain lizards and snakes. Some poisonous frogs and spiders too but you don’t have to worry about them today. I’ll start you off with something light.” 

“What do you consider ‘light’?” Just curious. 

Eren’s entire face lights up after that and he shifts in his seat, hands curling around the seatbelt (he looks so fucking beautiful). “I’ll introduce you to Lexi, my bearded dragon. And Terra! Terra is my emerald boa and she’s so sweet. I’ll walk you through the sanctuary too, just a quick tour because you're not used to them and the place... it’s more open space than closed. I don’t want 'em to feel confined, ya know.” 

“Not really but I’m sure I’ll see. The way you talk about them and this place... makes me kinda pumped.” Jean doesn’t expect his words to make Eren blush but they do. 

Eren’s cheeks turn this gorgeous shade of vermilion and he smiles this soft, soft smile that’s holding some secret Jean wants to uncover. “The pressure is on.” 

“You seem like the type that works best under pressure.” If that sounds like a sleazy come on, Jean doesn’t care. There’s nothing wrong with a little harmless flirting. Plus, he’s really starting to like Eren’s reactions to those sorts of things. 

For example, despite that light flush of gorgeous tan flesh, Eren’s smirk is confident and cocky when he says, “Little do you know, I work best under a lot of things.” 

And Jean hopes he covers the fact that he chokes on air (that he covers his sputter and the slight swerve of the wheel). Hopes. Probably doesn’t. 

Most definitely doesn’t because Eren snorts and rakes his hands through his hair -looks amused. “That was god awful and it still made you flustered.” 

Eren’s one to talk but Jean’s always liked a challenge, plus, he has his own set of bravado to contend with. “God awful or not, thinking about how you’d work under me, _that_ ruffled my feathers.” 

Yeah. Okay. Points for Jean there, Eren can concede those because he’s red to his roots and he feels all hot- yeah. “You’re kind of a dork,” which is a positive because- “I’m a dork too so it’s fine.” 

A dork huh… Jean’s never been called a dork in such a fond way but he likes it. Besides, if someone like Eren is considered a dork then he’ll definitely take that as a compliment. 

* * *

* * *

* * *

Surprisingly, Lexi _is_ cute as shit and Terra _is_ sweet. Never in his life did he think he’d be able to call a lizard cute or a snake sweet but he can and they are. 

But, before he met those two, he got to see the most amazing thing: Eren’s Sanctuary. 

It’s the size of a football field and a half. Feels bigger once inside and, speaking of inside, there’s an honest to god waterfall and it’s so fucking tropical and hot and the sounds… If Jean didn’t know better, he would’ve sworn he was in an actual rainforest. Anyway, the sanctuary is gorgeous. So fucking gorgeous. But even that can’t hold a match to Eren who looks right at home dragging Jean along the paths and hap hazardously introducing him to the various animals loitering the grounds. 

Fuck if Eren isn’t beautiful and Jean feels like such a sap because he keeps thinking it but it’s just a fact. 

Well… it’s easier to think about now that they’re sitting outside in a cute little shack eating and talking. Eren’s raving about that anaconda he brought back a few days ago but it went to the San Diego zoo and he’s happy she has some sort of home. Terra is spiraled around him all comfortably and she is cute. Or maybe Eren makes her cute –her scales are a reflection of his eye color. 

“Ugh, shit… I’m sorry.” 

Jean shakes his head and stares at Eren as opposed to into him, “For what?” 

Eren’s smile is sheepish, “We’ve been talking about me non-stop and I feel like a dick for that. I mean, I want to know about you too.” He really feels shitty about that. 

But… wow. Honestly, Jean didn’t even notice. Which he says and then he follows it with- “What do you wanna know? I’m an open book.” 

Eren hums, leans on the table, “I just want to know your story. Where you’re from, why The Pet Shop... stuff like that.” As far as he’s concerned, Jean’s kind of a mystery and that’s definitely his fault. 

“I’m from here but I go to college in Santa Cruz –UCSC. I’m pre-med. Umm… I’m home for the summer and I was looking for a job and then my uncle told me that he knew the owner of The Pet Shop and he hooked me up, which was sweet because the owner pays really well.” He’s still surprised by that. “I just want to make some money for the summer and have something to do other than bullshitting. Turns out, I like working there and I like the animals. The people… not so much.” 

A dark brow raises, “Why not?” 

“Because they’re so fucking annoying more than they’re not. Like, you get the creeps that come in and ask what animals are edible or the people who come in to tease the animals with a happy home but never come back or the preteen brats that try to flirt or what the fuck ever… too many of those types and not that many of you.” 

“And what’s my type?” 

“The enigmatic weirdo who loves animals a shit ton. Bonus, you’re cute.” And beautiful and well spoken with a big heart but that’s just what Jean knows after talking to him for a week. Surface shit that still manages to be compelling. 

And there’s that smile again, the one that holds a secret and then those rosy cheeks (like Eren isn’t used to being complimented). “You think I’m cute?” 

He’s not fishing, Jean can tell. Makes him cuter. “I think you’re ridiculously fucking cute when you look like that but you’ve got this sexy edge to you –like when you were handling Ollie back in the sanctuary and you looked at home and in control.” Mhmm. Eren’s equal parts cute and equal parts sexy and he’s smart and outgoing and Jean wants to know everything about him. 

He was captivated from the instant he saw him with all of those mice and insects –weird or not. 

It’s that simple. 

He really is a dork. 

That’s fine because Eren likes that about Jean. “You’re such a smooth bastard… I’m jealous. I’m too straightforward to try for suave so I’ll just come out and ask, do you want to go on an actual date with me?” 

Jean laughs and thinks _cute_ and then he’s grinning, “You didn’t consider this a date?” 

“You did?” 

“Of course. We had lunch, you showed me around your sanctuary, which isn’t a euphemism for something sexual but it might be –one day. And now we’re sitting here talking, drinking coffee, and eating cake. I figure it’s your rendition of dinner, a movie, and coffee, which makes it my turn to take you out next time.” 

“So that’s a yes to the proper date thing?” Eren feels giddy and it’s been a while since he’s been excited about something other than his babies. 

“You’re right, you are a dork. Yes. I want to go out again. I wasn’t expecting this to be a one-time deal.” Not even slightly. 

“Okay. Alright…” Eren takes a deep breath, rubs his cheeks because they hurt from how hard he’s been grinning, “I’m- Just talk for a minute, yeah. I’m too excited to make sense right now.” 

That makes Jean laugh straight from the gut (makes him think about how fucking adorkable Eren is). “I’m an only child. I hate most sweet shit for some reason but I could live off of sherbet. And I really want to kiss you but this is the first time we’re hanging out so I’ll save it for the second date.” 

“You can kiss me… if you want.” One kiss won’t hurt. At least, that’s what Eren will keep telling himself. 

“Think Terra will mind?” Jean doesn’t have to be told twice as he stands and walks around the table, stops in front of Eren. Why he’s not shitting himself over the snake that’s coiled around Eren, he has no idea. But he really wants to kiss those pink lips. 

“Oh- Just- One second.” Eren stands and puts Terra on the shelf, kisses her cool head and then cringes because Jean- Jean is right behind him and backing him into the wall. 

“So fucking cute… I’m kissing you goodnight and then I’m leaving but I'll definitely text you when I get home. We’ll plan for a second date, hopefully this weekend.” 

All Eren can do is nod and blink and- yeah. Kissing Jean is exactly like he assumes it'll be –tender and effortless. Jean just draws close and tilts his head, lets their lips touch before pulling away and repeating the action again and again until Eren whimpers and clutches at the front of his shirt. In that moment, he gets a little bolder. Sucks a supple bottom lip into his mouth and tugs gently. Causes Eren to keen and grip and pull and then Jean leans away, smile playing at lips that brush the corner of Eren’s mouth- 

“I’m gonna stop there… it’s the gentleman thing to do,” He says that but he can’t help one more kiss, one last nip- “Okay. I hate to kiss and run but- gentleman.” 

Eren’s too dazed to offer more than a wave goodbye and a snort when Jean chuckles on his way out. 

* * *

##### 

III. 

* * *

The second date is an extension of the first where they actually go to dinner and a movie. Jean learns that Eren hates horror films. Hates them. But he has a weak spot for Indian food and he absolutely can’t say no to ice cream (loves cake batter in particular). And his kiss the second time around is more assertive –seductive and sexier than Jean knows what to do with. The second date is a success. 

As are the third through sixth dates. 

The seventh date, Jean learns about Eren’s quick temper and competitive streak when they’re at the batting cages. Some asshole tries flirting via “lemme show you how to hit a fast ball” and Jean’s ready to stake his claim but Eren beats him to the punch –feels insulted. And shit should go downhill but Jean just thinks Eren’s too sexy for his own good with that temper and that mouth and he can’t help dragging Eren back to the car. They make out in the back seat like horny teenagers. It’s the best thing. 

The thirteenth date finds them back at the sanctuary but it’s different. So different. 

There’s a walk through that pseudo-jungle to a tropical tree house where there’s rum and vodka and Dom and fruit and chocolate and cheese and- And they get tipsy. Being tipsy makes Jean brazen enough to pin Eren to the floor and mouth at his throat, his ear, his jaw… drag his tongue across wet and waiting lips before slipping it in to a sweet mouth. But Eren’s much more outgoing. He gropes and cups Jean through his skinny jeans –arches and bucks until he’s groaning and moaning softly with the friction. 

The thirteenth date, Jean wakes up to the hiss of Ginger (a five foot monitor lizard), a headache, and a smiling Eren that’s staring up at him and Jean can’t help kissing him good morning. 

But that’s when he knows that he’s grown accustomed to Eren being a reptile, amphibian, arachnid, loving weirdo (they’re everything to Eren). And maybe Jean pegs himself a weirdo too because he doesn’t even bat an eye when Gin nudges Eren before snapping at his face. 

They’ve come a long way since the first date. 

And Jean’s pretty sure they’ll go a lot further. 

**Author's Note:**

> So there's this and I can definitely picture Eren being some sort of humanitarian with his own twist. Reptiles and amphibians scare the hell out of me but I've recently been introduced to a Bearded Dragon that's a precious little thing and an Emerald Boa who sleeps like a log (she's so cute) so they're growing on me! 
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading and if you dug it, drop a line or punch that kudos button!


End file.
